—The Illness Called Perfectionism—
by Rsur Thorai
Summary: His view of the world was just as different as Rika's, though not as extreme. But with how often he found himself thinking along the same lines as the woman he promised to love with all his heart, did she manipulate him? Internal beliefs twisted, personality almost erased, V throws himself into his work and receives a backlash from the pressure.


**This is rated T for reasons that apply to it, though I am more than likely going to up it to M eventually if I ever get to that part. This story is quite dark, though you can't really tell at only a glance. This will either be in V's POV (first) or Third POV (all/secondary all). It may (the more likely option) be both in a single chapter. Whatever flows best is the way it'll go.  
**

 **WARNINGS: Tinges of mental instability, fanatic religious beliefs and words, cuteness from an overly cute scene screened by creepiness, hints of emotional instability, swell hidden blackmail  
**

* * *

 _ **—The Illness Called Perfectionism—**_

 _ **1\. Photographic Memoir**_

* * *

I stared at the picture that was taken only the day before, of an apple orchard from a hillside. To the left of it was another of the sky as the sun set, and then one of it in the afternoon. Each picture became older and older as one continued to walk left. When I reached the end, a hand was placed on the wall that was the width of the building, blank. I exhaled, adjusted my black scarf, and spun around on my heel to go into my office. I peered through the blinds as a new group of visitors came in. Like every other time before this, the blonde haired woman was there, chartreuse orbs rolling over each picture taken as if waiting for something to change. I took the newest picture off of my desk and walked out of my bright white office, eying the blank wall from afar.

With a few suggestions from one of the passing workers, and with help, the picture was placed just above my head. I turned as a flash of saffron entered my vision, lo and behold the woman daily of two weeks past stood beside me. I wasn't surprised in the slightest that she was the first to come over here.

"It's beautiful..." she murmured in a soft voice, that of a melody. "You froze the moment when God touched the soil with his hands, awakening the world. You captured that moment forever," A sunrise wouldn't normally be compared with religious beliefs. I nodded my head.

"Yes, I suppose one could envision such a thing... I think I understand what you mean." She turned to me then, eyes alight, a bright grin on her face.

"Yes! Do you take these breathtaking photos to capture when God makes changes to the world?" I briefly felt myself stiffen, but I shifted so my discomfort wasn't noticed.

"I take photos whenever the situation is right," I say instead of going along with whatever fantasy she had. My phone rang. I took it out glancing at the ID. Then I looked back at the woman. "Excuse me for a moment."

I started to move away, phone to my ear. "Hello, Rui? The exhibition is still ongoing. I thought you wouldn't call until the week is over."

 _"Yes, but V... there were some issues with the next batch of pictures..."_ My brows furrowed as my friend continued on without prompt. _"Someone or something did something to your camera when I went to go print something off... the memory card is ruined. There's nothing left."_ I inhaled sharply. _"I'm sorry, V. All your pictures are gone."_

Is... is this a _joke?_

 _"I'll call you back in a few days. By then, your camera should have come back from the shop and arrive at your apartment."_ Why mail it? Is it because you don't want to take any blame? Is it because you're too much of a coward to face me? The line was cut, a beeping being heard. I turned my phone off, staring down at it.

My right hand fell to my side, my left going over my face, head tilted down. My breath was heavy as I exhaled.

"Um..." I didn't move. "Is something wrong? You look very upset..." I gritted my teeth as a hand touched my arm. I stepped away and turned around to see that woman, concern on her face.

 _'False, false, it's all false.'_ my mind supplied, though I wasn't sure why. I twisted my lips into a forced smile, though it probably appeared as a grimace.

"Just... Just some printing troubles. It's nothing to be worried over."

But aren't you?

The woman smiled, then. "I hope whatever happened gets resolved soon. Can I see you again... V?" It may have simply been my alias, though I didn't like how she said that letter. I only grunted, inclined my head, and made way for my office.

I had more things to worry about than a woman who shows up everyday for two weeks without fail who turns up to be religious to the point of concerning.

* * *

 _"What would you say if you were offered a job of doing a photo shoot for our school?"  
_

"...I would, if offered, accept the invitation."

 _"And if you were given the offer of being the art teacher, being the advisor to the photography club?"_

I sighed. "I would question what I would get in turn for being a teacher and ask what's the point of being an advisor?"

There was an awkward silence on the other line along with muttering. I shoved my phone under my ear so both hands were free. A new camera completely separate from my own to match the quality of the school would be at the very least five hundred if it was Nikon brand... and then there's the other necessities to think about. A new case would be needed, and the camera can't be Canon because then it'll get mixed up with mine. Does Rui use Nikon? I scrolled down. What about Von? It's decent enough, maybe around four hundred for the camera itself and additions... Would PowerShot be the only kind needed?

 _"We are currently unable to hire teacher other than abroad, and that isn't timely enough for us. The current teachers already have full schedules. Your mother mentioned to me once that you were looking into being a teacher at one time, and to be an advisor, you need to be a staff member-"_

"For the photo shoot, would PowerShot be the only kind needed?"

 _"I'm... sorry?"_

"PowerShot. Point and shoot. I need to know what kind of camera and what you'll want me to be doing. Point and shoot, in layman's terms, is simply that. One student equals one picture."

The only PowerShot that I know myself are of Canon, and I use those. The corner of my lips quirked into a half frown. Then again, I have both G7 X Mark and SX410 IS... Maybe another of the latter would be best, only with 40x Optical Zoom? That's around two sixty...

 _"A-Ah! Yes, that... that will do. So! Do you accept?"_ I sighed once more, this one more audible than the last.

"Very well. I will head the photo shooting for whatever days. Ask me about the teacher and advisor positions _after_ picture taking is done and over with. My email is v-at-cheritz-dot-com, you can send me the information through there." I turned my phone off, setting it aside and opening another tab to look at the Nikon brand.

...There's no way I'm paying eight hundred or more, and most definitely not almost three thousand, no matter how prestigious the school. Hm... would they possibly pay for it?

* * *

 _One Year Later_

I sighed as the first years came in. First day of school again. Great.

The Chairman and I made a compromise the year before. As a teacher whose time was mostly filled with personal work as a photographer, I'd only show up for certain days or half days when required. My pay would also be slightly lower than the full time teacher's as a result. In turn I would do shoots for the school when needed and simply make sure that the Photography Club don't act out, which is what I do already as a teacher.

When I wasn't convinced the first time, the Chairman said he'd buy any and all equipment for shoots and personal use (though this wasn't until three months later, of which the school year was already over). Looking back on it, I'm not embarrassed at my quick acceptance.

As the art teacher, it was... _interesting._ The first year class, 1-A, was the most loud and rowdy of every class I've seen. A pair of twins often harassed a brunette, almost without fail when I glance over.

My blue eyes shifted over to them, and the twins were at it again. I huffed, sliding off my scarf and silently moving closer to the trio.

"-And the boss will-"

I snapped the cloth over their heads, earning loud yelps. As they turned back, I raised a brow, face blank with my tone matching. "If you have time to harass Mi-" I paused for barely a second at the panicked look the girl gave. "...Mister Fujioka, then you have time to do your project." As they didn't move to start working, I frowned. Walking to my desk, I reached into a slot above my seat and pulled out a packet of papers, splitting them into two stacks and handing the twins one stack each.

"Alright, class. The Hitachins will be passing out packets on Eduard Munch. You are to read the packet, complete the attached questions, and turn it in. Keep in mind that your current project is still due on the required date." Each student either groaned or glared at the twins. They blushed and looked down, clearly flustered. The best part about this packet is that there are one hundred questions, and if I can complete half, the other teacher can finish the grading for me.

Eventually the bell rang, and so left the class with the devils. But I held the trio back.

I gestured for them to sit as the door slid shut. Dragging my own chair in front of them, I spun it towards them and sat with my ankle across my knee, arms crossed. "Why did I feel the need to address _Miss_ Fujioka as a male?" They twitched. My eyes narrowed as they fidgeted more in turn. "...Is this about your club I've been hearing about for the past week?" I started late. I was a week behind.

The twins nodded. The one on my left spoke; Hikaru, I think. "Yes, sensei, uh... She joined the club due to certain... circumstances... as a result she has to dress as a boy." I turned my gaze on the girl in disguise.

"H-He's right. If it got out that I was a girl, I can't be in the club anymore."

"Does this club interfere with any of its member's studies?" Negative. "...It remains to be seen where I am concerned. You do realize that any student can access the records, let alone adults, correct? It isn't able to be hidden either, as that's illegal."

They paled, but didn't look particularly worried. I mentally put that in my file labeled 'mysterious club'. It was growing thicker by the hour. I let my eyes pass over them again, this time slower.

"Who is your advisor for your club?" I ask, "And what is your club?"

They were slow to respond, as if momentarily paralyzed. "The H-Host Club..." I nodded, repeating the initial question. "We don't... have... one... Not to our knowledge, anyway." My eyes narrowed further.

"...Who are your president and vice president?"

"Tamaki Suoh-senpai and Kyoya Ootori-senpai." I nodded once more. "Very well," I wrote them a note each. "You may go now. Hopefully I won't need to change lesson plans from you twins not doing your work again." With sheepish looks, they left the classroom.

I rolled my seat back behind my desk and reached above my head into the shelf mentally labeled 'office papers'. Taking the only one out, I scribbled down an addition in the 'list' box before dating it and heading out to turn it in.

* * *

"V-sensei? Did you need something?" I shook my head. "Not in particular, I suppose. Please gather your members while I speak to you and your president." The Ootori's brows furrowed as he frowned lightly, but he nodded and gestured for me to sit in a chair. I chose to sit on the arm of it. Soon the other five members were at one seating section in the room while Tamaki and Kyoya came over to me.

"V-sensei, is something wrong?" inquired Tamaki with a look of worry. I gave them a small smile and they relaxed.

"For you? Yes. You see, I learned that your club doesn't have an advisor. For it's creation, every club needs an advisor to oversee the club despite its members handling it. Technically, right now your club is, under school law, illegal." They paled, though as with the twins, didn't seem to worried. My eyes narrowed and they began to fidget ever so slightly.

"Ootori, you should have most definitely known this information. Suoh, you as the Chairman's _son_ would _have_ to have this knowledge. You may think you can bypass school law with your father taking place of advisor, but that isn't really the case. An advisor has to be a _teacher_ and must be able to _physically_ oversee club activities. The Chairman has more than likely only heard rumors around the school, and that would only be a rare case as I know he doesn't take inspections as he is known to should have."

Now they were worried, and rightly so. Tamaki's father pretty much bypassed school law that he cannot change without going through the Board for his _son._ As a teacher you aren't supposed to play favorites, but as a _principal,_ you _cannot_ play favorites.

"I have a proposition for you, however," They perked up. "As you know, I am a nationwide known photographer in Korea who is quickly becoming known in Japan. I have many exhibitions to go through while I am here. I am also a half time teacher at Japan's most prestigious school and the advisor to the Photography Club. I hardly have any free time to de-stress. I'm willing to give up a bit of my exhibition time in turn for playing advisor for your little group and not taking this school illegal matter to the board."

They turned their backs to me and talked in rushed whispers. I rolled my eyes and sat back, already knowing the answer. In all the reality, there was only _one_ answer they could ever give. They turned back around with mixed emotions.

"Very well. Thank you for being the advisor for the Host Club, V-sensei." I only nodded, standing to walk over to the other members with both teens flanking me. Five heads shot up as I stood in front of them.

"Being short to the point, I am now your advisor that you should have had all along. I will now oversee your club everyday save for times when you don't, including accompanying you off campus as required by the school handbook, school law, and as the Board dictates. When you're having a meeting, I will be here. If you end club time early or have spare time after your meeting, I will be available to assist you with work from any class if needed. I also know your little secret of Haruhi being a girl, something of which you hid poorly, and of which can be accessed by quite literally anyone from the records. If you think you can hide that away, you're mistaken, because it's illegal to do so."

I checked my phone for the time. "Today's probably the only day I won't be able to stay for the allotted time. I have personal preparations to make, and as such I bid you anon."

* * *

I held Rika's hand, going down on one knee and held the open velvet box in the other.

"Rika, during the course of the year since I met you, I found you to be a very bright young woman with a knack for planning. Your quirks are an endearing as your abilities, and I am already working beside you in the RFA. We've gotten closer in the past months and I can easily see myself sharing my personal life with you day by day. Led together by the red string of fate, Rika Kim, will you marry me and spend the rest of our lives together, tied by the Celtic knot? Will you accept my pledge to love you, honor you, protect you, and cherish you with all my being that is able, and will you do so in turn?"

Crystal droplets falling over petal-like cheeks from soft chartreuse orbs, the woman's saffron locks bounced as she nodded, falling to her knees and wrapping her arms around my neck. "Of course I will, Jihyun Kim! And _yes,_ I'll marry you!"

I pushed her away slightly to kiss her, my own face splitting into a soft grin. I wiped away her tears with my thumb, trying to calm myself with the burst of emotion in my chest. I blinked rapidly as my own vision flooded with tears nonfalling. She laughed, a bell-like sound tinkling in the night in a summer's midnight breeze. She pressed her forehead to mine.

"May God watch over us and bless us with the sun's rays." As she pressed her lips to mine, I ignored the sudden, sharp, ugly feeling in my gut. It was the same feeling I got when I met her.

I may not understand nor quite like or believe in her words that she often said, something so similar to that of a fanatic, but I love her. I love her, and I would give my all to be with her, no matter what she did. Even if she hurt me in the end, no matter how _unclean_ I felt when around the woman, I would stay by her side. Isn't my love pure and proof enough in that regard?


End file.
